Bleeding Cool Launches New Column: F-You, You Bloody Effing Sod

Bleeding Cool tries shocking new twists to generate controversy. Nothing new though.

Bleeding Cool is launching a new feature called “F You, You Bloody Effing Sod, and F Your Mother Too She’s A Bitch”, as part of its continued efforts to expand and grow in the field of comic book and media journalism, despite claims by site founder and editor Rich Johnston that the site is not engaged in the practice of journalism or virgin sacrifice.

This new feature is affectionately referred to as “F You”, with many readers and creators claiming that independent columns are a direct “F  you” to them personally.

The columns will feature polarizing commentary from noted industry movers and shakers.  The first column will feature Matt Casperson, currently employed as a salesperson for an adult novelty shop in Fresno, California, sharing his belief about the impotency and erectile dysfunctions of various fictional characters, specifically Spider-Man whom he notes “went back to mechanical web-shooters to get his goo out”.

Future columns will feature a comic book store employee that once heard someone say Mark Waid is a child abuser, and Kyle Bradley, who once wrote a letter that was published in Hero Illustrated, providing fictional narratives of various artists raping innocent people.  Former Bleeding Cool nemesis Rob Granito will contribute his recollections of time spent learning from, working with, and ultimately teaching, Dwayne McDuffie.

Some see this as a natural extension of recent Bleeding Cool columnists, such as Kate Kolter, Heather Kenealy,and Mark Allen Haverty.

Kolter wrote a column called Geek Girl on the Street in which she regularly complained about multiple aspects of Doctor Who and its related properties.  After stumbling onto the mostly well received concept of engaging in conversation with professionals in the comic book world and sharing their insight, she abruptly stopped writing.

Kenealy’s work on the site consisted of a number of reviews of DC relaunch titles.   Her earlier works were criticized for comparing well regarded standouts of the relaunch to indie books about girls suffering from punctuation.  After her reviews began to generally mirror the consensus, she too stopped writing.

Haverty, a more recent addition, shares the insight and wisdom he gleaned as a freelance Wizard price guide editor, Vermont resident, former English major, and possible political science, history and psychology major, through stories accusing industry creators of being liars, drunks, and braggarts.  Haverty, whose work generally continues to contradict both facts and good taste, continues contributing to the site.

Few comic creators, who are known for their timid ways, were willing to go on record about the proposed column citing a general fear of Bleeding Cool’s power.  Bleeding Cool is one of the top 15 comic book news and information sites, ranking alongside Comic Book Resources, Newsarama, Comic Vine, Comics Alliance, Comics Continuum, Comics Worth Reading, MTV’s Splashpage, IGN Comics, Comicon.com’s Pulse, iFanboy, Ain’t It Cool, Major Spoilers, Comic Book Therapy, and Broken Frontier.  Many in the industry fear that not having their books and plot twists incorrectly spoiled on Bleeding Cool may jeopardize sales to readers who are unfamiliar with the breadth and scope of existing news alternatives.

One creator, “Charles” Dixon, whose name has been changed to protect his anonymity, said “Really?  This is what entertains you guys?  Old news about things that don’t matter?  Salacious gossip about imaginary feuds?”

Another creator, Chris Samnee, whose request for anonymity was denied, took the criticism one step further, adding “Wait, isn’t your bitching about their bitching just as bad?  None of you see anything wrong with this?  Really?  None of you?”